Can we make ourselves happier?

So far we’ve established that the desire for happiness is central in virtually all we do. We’ve also come up with a concrete definition of what we mean by happiness. Quoting from last time, “It’s not that we want to feel good forever and always, it’s that we want to feel good about where we are and where we’re going in life.”

It’s important to define what can be a difficult concept to pin down and to acknowledge the extent to which happiness dominates the way we live. That said, few of us need convincing that we all want to lead happy lives. The first difficult question we must confront is whether or not we can take actions that will lead to better happiness outcomes. Is this even possible?

The concept of the hedonic treadmill accounts for the interplay between genetics and life circumstances in determining happiness. “Hedonic” means “that which relates to pleasure” and for our purposes is interchangeable with “happiness”. The idea is that each person has their own genetic happiness set point. No matter what life brings us, be it a lottery win or a death in the family,  we eventually settle back into our genetically determined level of happiness.

The theory seems to indicate that happiness is largely a result of our genetic make up and that we have little say in making a difference in our happiness. Not so fast. Studies have shown that our level of happiness is determined as shown in the chat below.

What we do counts almost as much as what we were born with. Intentional activity (the actions we take) counts four times as much as the circumstances life throws at you. Each of us has a tremendous say in our own happiness. The video below illustrates this theory clearly.

It shows two twins (who share genetic make up) with comparable life circumstances. One is happier than average, the other less happy than average. The vital difference being the attitudes and actions of each twin. The happy twin is positive and proactive. The  unhappy twin is negative and resigned to her circumstances. If the unhappy twin makes an effort to change her outlook and her actions, she can become happier.

The essential concern we have is that “we want to feel good about where we are and where we’re going in life.” It turns out that we all have the power to become happier through our own actions.

These can’t just be any actions. We have to do the right kinds of things to become happier. This means we need to make the right kind of decisions first. How do we do that?